Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Real Mommy Moment: No Need to Seize

Yesterday, a few friends posted this article on Facebook from the Huffington Post. Then a few more. Then a few more. It is entitled, Don't Carpe Diem by Momastery writer Glennon Melton and by the comment thread on the post, it has people talking on both sides of the fence. Summary of the article: Despite the constant reminder from older strangers while out shopping, during the chaotic days of motherhood, it is difficult to embrace every moment when all you want to do is get through the day. I am a mother of three and a wife, leaving little to no time for me as I strive to make each day a memorable experience. My days are often hurried and rushed. Between getting uniforms prepped, packing lunches, shuttling to practice, then back home for dinner and homework. The only thing that we are seizing at the end of a long day is a big fat cocktail.
     After over 7 yeas as a parent, I've learned it's ok not to breathe in every moment despite my daily effort. I have also learned that all my children really want is my consistent presence and love. In between the spilled milk on the floor and the rank diaper toddling about the house, I often look around and have to laugh at all that I deal with in 24 hour period. My husband often jokes that when he wakes up, I have already had a full day. He's right because I have. I wake up before everyone to do yoga, blog, clean, return emails & whatever else my personal hour (or less if I wake up late) brings my way. Sometimes I just take in the sound of silence. It is my time and allows me to better enjoy my day. After that, I am mom & wife for the rest of it. My day is better because I have made time for me without the resentful thinking of when do I get some alone time?
     All I can ever remember dreaming about was being a mother. I wanted a house full of little ones that I would take care of and now I do. How blessed am I that the dream came true? Now as is  the case with all dreams, there was no reality involved. The Mommy reality of tears, potty training, budgeting, diapers and all the rest doesn't set in until you've been crowned a mother. No one can prep you for all that. If there was a real parenting prep course, would you take it? I think that it would scare most people away but also not paint a fair picture of how parenthood truly is. With all the craziness of raising children is the absolute greatness of raising children and if we cannot embrace the moments at the moment, well...that is what a digital camera is for.
The pic below is an example of how Chronos time turned into Kairos time:
This was supposed to be a posed pic but the 2nd reach over to kiss the 3rd.
Priceless. Seizing imperfection became our New Year's Card 2011.
Photo by Ana Foulds Photography
Here are My 3 Simple Tips for daily parenting success:
1. Find yourself a supportive partner. My husband is my best friend & there each night (and my meltdowns in between)
2. Never forget who is in charge. After some sass mouth and a terrible tantrum, we tend to forget.
3. Eat good food & drink plenty of water. You'll need some serious fuel to play the Mommy game.
4. Hire a photographer for special events. You can enjoy life & let someone else capture it.


Kudos to Glennon Melton for speaking the truth. More mothers should talk openly and not judge in private. We honestly all feel the same way some of the time but are too afraid to say it. She has opened the door for a real conversation on motherhood. Brava, mama!

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